pissy

I am tired of pissy people. The problem is I am pissy too. We have lost a contract at work, there are rumors of lay-offs and people are worried. I understand that, but don't use that as an excuse to slack off. I have been there too long, maybe I am burnt out. I am not tired of the job duties, but of all the other bullshit that occurs. My supervisor hates confrontation, she wants everyone to be happy, to work together, but she wants to ignore the problems. Teamwork is a word I hear over and over. "Work together, we'll get through this." I think I want another team; I want to be traded. No, I want to be a free-agent, I want to only look out for myself.

I can tell myself it is other people, I can claim it is the situation at work, but I would be lying, it is me. It extends beyond work, I look at my sons and I think: "Who raised you!" Sadly, that would be me. I am a single mom, their fathers were absent. I can blame their gender, their fathers' gene pool, society, their peers, but ultimately, it comes back to me.

I am Mary Ann, stranded on this damn island. I am surrounded by buffoons, trying to fix the radio with coconuts. I have tried being cheery, supportive and upbeat, but now I just want off the island. I want to escape, to run-away for a few days. No time clock, no kids, no pets. Oh wait....in one week, I do get off the island for two days. Nice hotel, stimulating company, maid service. Maybe I'll be Ginger for a change.